I received an email from Jennifer Barnes, a Newhall mom, after the holiday weekend. She writes, “Christmas is over now and I’m feeling a little down. It’s sad to think that all the joy can disappear so fast and the thought of going back to work after an amazing holiday experience is depressing.
How can I stay motivated after the holidays?”
Most of us during the holidays get emotionally attached to the deep feelings of love, joy, and togetherness only to have it last for a short period of time and abruptly disappear. As a result, many people will suffer a letdown with depression setting in within a few days or even up to a few weeks after.
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When I hear you say that you are feeling a little down and how sad you get after Christmas tells me a lot. I don’t believe staying motivated is what you’re really looking for. Sometimes we find what we are seeking in places where we least expect them to be; by being open to new possibilities and new perspectives. This will open up an opportunity for you to notice and realize a valuable life lesson if you are willing to hear the message within yourself.
Jennifer, are you open to the possibility that your conscious could be telling you something that you have not been aware of or acknowledging? The possibility that every year, all year and a little at a time that you have been slowly disconnecting from the people that matter most to you?
It is not uncommon for human beings to slowly and automatically put up walls to protect us from being hurt, disappointed and rejected by the people we love the most.
Christmas has unconsciously become a universal symbol for all of humanity to give individuals permission to be vulnerable, lowering our guards and temporarily bring down the walls that protect us from experiencing pain and rejection; giving us the most valuable Christmas gift of all; the ability to feel connected and experience a deeper sense of love, joy and fulfillment with our friends and families.
However when Christmas is over, we go back to automatic pilot and the walls reform to once again protect ourselves from being hurt, disappointed and rejected by the people we care about. I believe that the let down feeling and depression is really the sadness in your Soul. Your Soul knows the truth of how capable you are of experiencing deeply connected and loving relationships all the time.
There is a good possibility Jennifer that Christmas could be revealing its greatest gift to you, the gift of realization. Realizing that deep connections with your loved ones bring you the greatest joys of happiness, worthiness, peace and ultimate fulfillment.
The thought of going back to work after an amazing Christmas is an entirely different issue. There is a good possibility that either you are not passionate about what you do for a living or you cannot see the value that you offer or the difference you make at work.
Here are three coaching tips to help you start creating the joyfulness and fulfillment of a Christmas experience all year long and one tip on how to be excited about work regardless whether you’re coming back from Christmas or a long vacation.
- The same unconscious programming you have created to keep you safe and protected from experiencing pain, disappointment and rejection is the same programming that keeps us from experiencing love, happiness and ultimate fulfillment. Practice vulnerability; in order for deep connections to exist, we must be willing to allow ourselves to fully be seen.
- Realize deeply that YOU are a powerful creator. You create your own reality, happiness, experiences and results in life. Start creating joy, happiness and fulfillment now in everything you do, in every moment regardless if you believe that you do not know how. Practice makes perfect.
- Be the cause in life and not the effect of it. Decide that when a party goes from boring to fun is when you choose to bring “FUN” to the party.
- Seek out your life’s passions; the things that bring you joy, excitement and purpose. Figure out how to start earning from it or shift your perspective to what it is that you are doing now for a living and discover what a difference you make.
Alex Urbina is one of the leading experts on Teen & Parent Relationships and Teen Leadership. His vast experience in human potential and personal development has made him one of the premier family coaches and an international trainer.
Alex’s experiential Teen Life Leadership Training is being implemented in various schools and youth organizations helping empower teens to discover their personal power and realize their full potential.
Alex is a resident of the Santa Clarita Valley and is exclusively offering his trainings to our community. You can also tune into his weekly radio show called the “Teen Life Leadership Training” on your Hometown Station, AM 1220, KHTS every Wednesday at 1pm and continue to educate yourself on teen and family relationships.