More so than any other genre of film, horror movies are the most difficult to review as they don’t set out to be anything more than what you see on screen. The acting is rarely anything that resembles Oscar worthy, the stories are straightforward and don’t really aspire to be clever, and you know that there is a 99.99% chance that there will be no clear resolution and it will just set up an equally uninspiring sequel. So, then the question remains, why are horror movies so popular despite these flaws?

Well, it’s because they are so simple that audiences love them, and if done right their ridiculous nature provides an evening of amusement.

I had the choice of either seeing “The Final Destination” in 3-D or “Halloween II,” and while watching moronic teens get impaled by everything from a rock shooting out of a lawnmower (I’m not kidding), to a tire flying off a NASCAR vehicle and crushing someone (still not kidding), in 3D, I figured that I’d instead go with “Halloween II” because really the best horror movies come in the form of slasher films.

In case you didn’t see the first one (or the originals, and if you haven’t I pity you), the story goes like this: Michael Myers is still on the loose and he’s still in pursuit of his little sister. Dr. Loomis (Malcolm MacDowell) is still giving lectures on having been Myers’ psychologist and is thoroughly convinced that Myers is dead. There you go. That’s the plot but as I’ve said before who cares about the plot.

America loves slasher movies because they are violent and provide some great moments of unintentional humor. This movie is no exception. They go for the laughs and for the bloodshed. That’s why I liked this movie, I got everything I wanted out of it but like most horror movies I won’t really need to see it again unless it’s at a friend’s house around Halloween.

I’ve been a fan of Rob Zombie for years. I listened to him when he was the lead singer for White Zombie and really dug his solo stuff (Hellbilly Deluxe being his best work). He’s also proven he has a knack for directing as well (his best work being “The Devils Rejects”). He’s continuing the trend of remaking and re-imagining slasher movies that, while not superior to the originals, offer some great gore and laughs that act as an antithesis to the redundant Saw movies that we’ve been given every Halloween.

So if you like horror movies check this out, or “The Final Destination” in 3D. If you’re not into horror, I suggest then checking out “Taking Woodstock.”

Thanks as always for reading and stay tuned as I go to work with Mike Judge’s “Extract”.

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By Chauncey Telese