Written with a newsy touch from the older, rural news days….

A rumor floating on the rural dust clouds says that Mr. SCV might be leaving our humble tumbleweed junction. To echo friends on Facebook, say it ain’t so, JB!

John Boston, who I met when he had another name, (i.e., Way Before Mr. SCV) is one of the most clever people I know.

He’s decided to simplify, to lighten his load, to unburden himself of earthly baggage, and move on.

And he figured out how to get all of us media types to advertise his garage sale for free.

Gotta hand it to him. I may have locked horns with my fellow 4/7 (we share a birthday), but more often then not, I learned something in those years I sat across from him at work.

He taught me that there are some parts of the world where humor is an endangered species, that clip files are worth the investment of time and big black binders and that while one might not make a lot of money writing, it sure does soothe the soul.

JB is freeing himself of earthly bounds, except for the miniature hand he holds dear, that of his beloved daughter. When I heard JB was going to be a father, I remember just smiling from ear to ear. He was getting a life-changing gift.

When I heard it was a girl, I laughed from the bottom of my toes.

The beautiful force of nature in his cradle would soon become the teacher.

And I’ve never met a more willing, jovial student.

The rumor that blew through here told me that for the time being, JB is not going too far. Heard that, in an attempt to perfect his mosey, there might be some slow walking through Castaic for soul-searching conversations and laughter with a longtime friend. But allegedly – as they taught me to say at the Writing Gym Of Sweat And Sarcasm – Mr. SCV is headed for Santa Rosa.

Would that make him Mr. SR? Methinks the people of Spamtown might file a lawsuit. Maybe they could get that guy who’s going after the Summit swim team. I hear he’s a real barracuda.

Anyway, back to the load lightening. Over the years, through several changes in domiciles, Boston (I can’t call him Mr. SCV. Too crown and sceptre. It’s also Step 5 of my Former Pageant Reporter Rehabilitation Program) has accumulated a treasure trove of stuff.

He is emptying the shelves of the transient Scared O’Bears Ranch, currently in Sand Canyon, but formerly of Newhall and Placerita Canyon.

The historian in me bristles with fear when I look at his inventory list and I hope that someone with a museum in mind has the forethought and bank balance to show up at said garage sale (which is being held this weekend, Saturday and Sunday, starting at 8 a.m.).

If there is one thing Boston and I share, it’s an appreciation of the old stories and people who lived them. I swear if I have to tell one more person who Ruth Newhall was, I’m gonna deck ‘em. Johnny and I just shake our heads. There’s something to be said about that staid “institutional memory.”

Too bad “knowing where the bodies are buried” is no longer a valued job talent.

A sampling of the SOBR Liquidation Sale catalog:

Old Signal items, including two typewriters used by Scott Newhall, a drafting table used by Randy Wicks, a bust of A.B. Perkins; photos, books, branding irons (yes, we used those at The Signal in the old days), the chair of former Universal Studios mogul and “Spartacus” producer, Edward Muhl, an autographed photo of Wm. S. Hart and valuable items too numerous to list.

Furniture, from sofas to cabinets to tables and chairs, washer/dryer, microwave, refrigerator, beds and bedding, hutches, living room chairs, coffee and end tables, lamps, TVs, filing cabinets, office stuff, bookcases, etc.

His personal, Bostonian memorabilia; bolo ties, unique Western wear, his personal saddle and tack, canteens, holster, saddlebags, boots and hats.

All sorts of unique artwork

Tools, power and otherwise, garden tools, tool boxes and a chainsaw

Two computers, scanner and a color printer

Kitchenware, including giant pots and pans (I already have his secret ingredient that made chicken soup truly medicinal and miraculous), food processor, toaster and his coffee cup collection (I am so tempted to buy this just to make his fellow Class of 68 Hart High Indian to whom I am married go a little crazy).

And that great garage sale catchall, “unique antiques and SCV memorabilia.”

Yes, Johnny’s having a garage sale. After the dealers and shysters pick him over, I think I might mosey up with a cold Coke and visit a bit. Pick up a few intangibles, words of wisdom. I know he’s only a click or call away, but Mr. SCV in his native habitat is something to treasure.

Scared O’Bears Ranch is located at 15353 Iron Canyon (off of Sand Canyon, look for Estate Sale signs). Sale starts at 8 a.m. Early arrivals will be dealt with according to NRA regulations.