Let me just say this before anything else: I am a Bruce Willis fan. I am…I really am.

He’s been in a bunch of movies that I’m quite fond of, including “Pulp Fiction,” “Die Hard,” “12 Monkeys,” and “The Fifth Element.” The problem, is that he’s also made a lot of cringe-worthy movies. I realize that every actor makes the occasional bad movie but there are certain actors whose body of work is so inconsistent that just there mere presence in a movie’s trailer causes the audience to get immediately turned off. This is what I call the Nicholas Cage rule (named after the worst offender). Guess what? “Surrogates” is a great example of this rule.

When I first saw the trailer, I thought it looked like a neat science fiction movie, but just the fact that Bruce Willis was in it raised some red flags and in my mind I could hear Han Solo say “I’ve got a bad feeling about this”.

The plot of the movie is this: In the future, humans plug into a machine and a surrogate version of themselves goes out and does all of the living for them. They all look like the idealized versions of themselves and they get to do anything they want. If their surrogate dies, its no big deal; they get another one.

However, here’s the twist: A surrogate gets killed and so does the human who controls it. I know you totally didn’t see that coming did you? Well, this leads to FBI Agents Greer (Willis) and Peters (Radha Mitchell investigating how this could’ve happened (by the way they too are in surrogate mode). When Willis is nearly killed (his surrogate not so lucky) he sees the world how it really is. He does not look like the well dressed man his surrogate is (his surrogate sports a really bad toupee that harkens back to when Willis tried to be a musician under the pseudonym Bruno, remember? Well Youtube it…trust me it’s hilarious).

Anyways, after seeing just how blurred reality has become, he continues to investigate why these murders are happening and discovers some shocking truths (I am joking of course, they’re not that shocking).

This movie was what I expected, which was not much. It has some car chases and fight scenes and what not, but it was not all that entertaining. It gets a little ridiculous even by action movie standards and will make you miss the Bruce Willis of old. If you don’t want to see this, then there is also the horror film “Pandorum” starring Dennis Quaid, and the remake of “Fame”.

Thanks for reading and stay tuned as next week I go to the coolest amusement park ever when I visit “Zombieland”. As always you can catch these and other great movies at your local Edwards Cinemas. Click here for local show times.

-Chauncey Telese