Home » Santa Clarita News » Alex Urbina - Life Leadership » Santa Clarita Life Coach Alex Urbina: Emotional Honesty
Alex Urbina Radio Show

Santa Clarita Life Coach Alex Urbina: Emotional Honesty

Santa Clarita Life Coach Alex Urbina is talking about emotional honesty in an effort to help people communicate more effectively with their loved ones.


Sponsored Articles


Ellen Tunick, who co-hosts “The Alex Urbina Radio Show” with Urbina on KHTS, shared a recent experience she had communicating with her daughter as an example.

Tunick noted that she was feeling overwhelmed between the medical issues and surgeries her husband was experiencing, their grandson’s high school graduation and plans for their daughter and her three boys to visit from out of the area.

Related: Santa Clarita Life Coach Alex Urbina Shares 15 Things Women Want From The Men In Their Lives

“I thought to myself, ‘How can I make it easier on myself?’” she said. “Never asked myself that before. My theory always was, ‘What more can I do?’”

Though she initially thought there was “nothing” she could do, at the prompting of her other daughter, Tunick made the decision to be what Urbina called emotionally honest about her feelings.

“I took a chance,” she said. “My biggest thing was, am I going to hurt her feelings? … I made up all those stories in my head about, if I did that, what would happen.”

But Tunick noted that her daughter said it sounded like she needed “a little space” at the moment, and that it wouldn’t be a “catastrophe” to reschedule for August when the timing might be better.

Urbina pointed out the importance that Tunick gave herself “permission” to be emotionally honest and not give into the “fears” that often come with that.

“(Emotional honesty) takes an ability for you to self-reflect, look deep down in what’s going on,” he said. “You had to trust that. A lot of people don’t because the fear comes up, and then we make up stories — ‘How is she going to handle that? She won’t probably won’t take it very well.’”

Urbina continued that by trusting herself and sharing how she was feeling from a vulnerable place, Tunick then gave her daughter the opportunity to be compassionate and offer a “simple fix” of picking another date for the visit.

“Most of us don’t trust that process,” he said. “We’ve never been invited to participate like that, we’ve never really taken the risk to operate like that or communicate like that, so we don’t know what’s possible for us to create these successful outcomes.”

One way Tunick could have approached being emotionally honest with her daughter to help ensure her fears of being misinterpreted and causing hurt feelings didn’t come true was to utilize a communication method Urbina calls “the tee-up” before “the ask.”  

“It’s a communication that I’m going to have with you and I’m going to be telling you how I want you to listen to the information that I’m going to share with you,” he explained. “It would sound like this: ‘Hey, honey, I want to have a conversation with you, but I have a couple concerns that I want to address before we get into it. The first one is, when I share this, what I’m afraid of is that you’re going to hear it like this, like you’re not wanted, that you’re not loved, that you’re not welcomed here, and that’s totally not the truth.’ So you just handled one fear.”

Urbina continued, “Once you prepare them of how you want them to listen and you’ve already shared your own fears and being honest about it, she’s going to be listening through different filters now.”

Ed. Note: This article is a KHTS Community Spotlight based on the latest “The Alex Urbina Radio Show” on KHTS. 

Santa Clarita Life Coach Alex Urbina is one of the leading experts on teen, parent and family relationships. Specializing in personal transformation, Urbina has more than 20 years of experience as a life coach Santa Clarita residents can depend on. His Life Leadership Training programs have been implemented in schools, youth organizations and transformational centers across the country. Urbina is also the author of “The Inspirational Parent: The Magical Ingredients for Effective Parenting” and host of “The Alex Urbina Radio Show: Helping You Reach Your Full Potential” on KHTS, which airs Fridays at noon.

Alex Urbina

661-505-5021

alex@alexurbina.com

Alex Urbina, Santa Clarita

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tO549SGTN-E

Alex Urbina, Santa Clarita Life Coach, Life Coach Santa Clarita, Personal Transformation, Parenting, Parenting Books, The Inspirational Parent

KHTS FM 98.1 & AM 1220 - Santa Clarita News - Santa Clarita Radio

Santa Clarita Life Coach Alex Urbina: Emotional Honesty

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

*

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

About KHTS Newsroom

KHTS FM 98.1 & AM 1220 focuses on Santa Clarita news, traffic, weather, sports, and also plays music. Bringing you SCV breaking news first and keeping you up to date with Santa Clarita events.