Santa Clarita Life Coach Alex Urbina: Taking Control Of Negativity

Posted by: KHTS Newsroom in Alex Urbina - Life Leadership, Santa Clarita Latest News February 28, 2019 - 1:25 pm 0 472 Views

Santa Clarita Life Coach Alex Urbina is talking about the power negativity seems to have over so many people, and how to take control of that negativity in order to access your full potential.

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Urbina noted that those who constantly have a negative perspective are usually getting some sort of unconscious “payoff” from that negativity that goes all the way back to their childhood.

For example, if at five years old, a child expresses a negative way of looking at something for the very first time and receives some kind of validation, sympathy or other attention as a result, they will keep returning to that “tool” because they got something from it, according to Urbina.

Related: Santa Clarita Life Coach Alex Urbina To Hold ‘Empowering Teens’ Workshop

“You can go down that road and keep going to the negative perspective over and over again not realizing that you’re getting some kind of payoff from it,” he explained. “It’s a total unconscious thing that most of us are doing.”

Before long, that negativity will likely dominate that person’s inner voice and inner dialogue, and if left unchecked, will continue to “run amuck” until the person has a dysfunctional view of the world and becomes depressed, according to Urbina.

Urbina called the “entity” within ourselves controlling that inner voice our “ego,” whose job is to protect us and keep us safe in life, which when achieving its purpose in a healthy way, will tell us to move out of the way if a tree branch is falling in front of us or avoid turning onto a street that looks dangerous.

“However, in our lives as we’re making choices,” Urbina said, “as we’re taking on new tasks or new challenges and things that scare us, sometimes when you don’t tell the ego, ‘Hey, I’m not in a dangerous spot so go sit in the back corner,’ when you don’t consciously shut it down, it steps in and goes, ‘Hmm, you’re going to take that on? Remember the last time you took that on? You were not chosen, so why are you going to do it again? You obviously don’t have the talent.’ And then it just starts going on its thing because it wants to protect me from failing.”

In order to take control of the ego and the negative inner voice that comes along with it, Urbina noted that it’s important to be aware of what’s going on and why, and to force yourself to notice when it starts.

“The more you notice your inner dialogue, that’s the moment that you can actually start to control it, shut it down, quiet it,” he said. “When they talk about taking control of your life, that’s that conscious moment that you go, ‘I’m in control.’”

Urbina compared the ego running your inner dialogue to Oz in “The Wizard of Oz,” who appeared to be a powerful, terrifying force until Dorothy looked behind the curtain and realized Oz was actually an unintimidating “little” man running a machine.

“Once you peek behind the curtain and you see that Oz is the little guy running the machine,” Urbina said, “you go, ‘Hey little guy, go take a seat in the corner. I’m taking control of this thing.’”

Ed. Note: This article is a KHTS Community Spotlight based on the latest “The Alex Urbina Radio Show” on KHTS.

Santa Clarita life coach Alex Urbina is one of the leading experts on teen, parent and family relationships. Specializing in personal transformation, Urbina has more than 20 years of experience as a life coach Santa Clarita residents can depend on. His Life Leadership Training programs have been implemented in schools, youth organizations and transformational centers across the country. Urbina is also the author of “The Inspirational Parent: The Magical Ingredients for Effective Parenting” and host of “The Alex Urbina Radio Show: Helping You Reach Your Full Potential” on KHTS, which airs Fridays at noon.

Alex Urbina

661-505-5021

alex@alexurbina.com