A Santa Clarita grief counseling expert recently talked about the importance of listening to those who may be going through hard times in their life.

Sharon Brubaker, a Certified Grief Recovery Specialist, sat down with Renee’ Kaehny — a local wellness coach who has worked in the community for 28 years — to talk about the need to listen to those going through hard times in their life.

“The moment when we can actually honestly reach out to someone and say, ‘Hey, I’m really struggling, I’m really hurting right now,’ the minute you do there is just so much relief,” Kaehny said.

Related: Santa Clarita Grief Support Group Leader Talks About Importance Of Being Willing, Ready To Process Grief

Kaehny met Brubaker after losing her 17-year-old son to suicide. Two months later, his father also took his own life.

“Needless to say, I’ve got some experience in this area,” Kaehny said.

The two opened their conversation by asking people who may be experiencing hard times or having thoughts of self-harm to reach out.

“We really just want to reach them and let them know that there is a community of people willing to sit with you and talk to you and just really listen,” Brubaker said.

Brubaker and Kaehny emphasized the importance of having conversations about suicide and self-harm, despite the fact that the subject is considered taboo by some.

“I think it’s super uncomfortable for people,” Kaehny said. “I think so many people have these emotions or these feelings and have dealt with them, and they just don’t know how to voice their feelings.”

“One of the reasons we are doing this show is because we have to be talking about this,” Brubaker added. “We all have to make the change to get the word out there.”

When a person approaches you and shares that they are hurting, Brubaker says not to try and “fix”them.

“We can’t fix someone who’s hurting,” Brubaker said. “But we can listen to them.”

Instead, Brubaker encourages people to listen to them, and to hold the space for that person who is hurting.

“That means you show up without judgement, not trying to fix them, not trying to tell the story,” she said. “Sometimes you might just sit next to them on the couch and not say a word.”

Anyone seeking information about mental health resources available in the Santa Clarita Valley can click here for a list of resources. There are 24-hour phone numbers available. In the event of an emergency, 911 should always be the first call. Those looking to speak with someone can call Brubaker at 661-212-0720 or choose from the following:

• 1-800-273-8255 for the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline
• 1-800-854-7771 for the Los Angeles County Department of Mental Health
• 1-800-784-2433 for the Treatment Advocacy Center
• 661-259-9439 for the SCV Child & Family Center
• 661-296-4444 for the Way Out Recovery SCV 
• 661-288-4800 for the Santa Clarita Valley Mental Health Center
• 661-257-9688 for the Santa Clarita Valley Youth Project

Santa Clarita grief counseling expert Sharon Brubaker has over 11 years of experience as a Certified Grief Recovery Specialist. The grief counseling expert specializes in the Grief Recovery Method in Santa Clarita, and offers an 8-week education program that she teaches in person, utilizing her free eBook titled “Grief Recovery.” As a grief counseling expert, Santa Clarita residents dealing with loss or other unfinished business who desire a lasting change can be guided on their journey of pain to find healing in their lives.

Sharon Brubaker

Certified Grief Recovery Specialist

27772 Avenue Scott

Valencia, CA 91355

661-212-0720

Sharon Brubaker, Valencia

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UuZhTBcm_w0

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