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Life Coach In Santa Clarita: Angry Teens

A life coach in Santa Clarita is sharing what he feels is the best way parents can approach their teenager if he or she suddenly seems to be angry, irritated or annoyed frequently.


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Many parents feel that they have given their teenager “everything,” and cannot understand why the teen can be so angry on a regular basis given the countless things they “should be” grateful for and happy about, according to Alex Urbina. 

The first issue with this common mindset is the use of the words “should be,” according to Urbina. 

Related: Life Coach In Santa Clarita: How To Have An Extraordinary Relationship

“‘Should be’ is a disease that we have as parents that actually is toxic for us,” Urbina said. “If you look through the glasses called, ‘My son or daughter should be a specific way,’ then any other way they show up is not good enough for you.”

Urbina encouraged parents to remove these words from their vocabulary, and instead replace them with thoughts like, “I would love for my son to be grateful,” so they are not let down if the teen is not. 

Another common mistake Urbina urged parents to avoid is labelling their teen by viewing them as an angry son or an ungrateful daughter. 

“In the moment, they’re just being angry. It’s not necessarily who they are, it’s just an emotion that they’re feeling,” Urbina said. “Don’t label your kids, just realize that they’re going through something specific and they’re experiencing some kind of emotional feelings, … but it’s a temporary feeling. In its design, our feelings are designed to run their course.”

Once a parent has removed the words “should be” from their vocabulary and stopped labelling their teens, Urbina encourages parents to take on the perspective that the frequent anger is an opportunity for them to teach their teen how to manage it.

“Your job as a parent is to teach your kids,” Urbina said, “not think that you taught them when they were 4 years old how to manage their anger, and then realize when they’re 15 or 16, ‘Oh my God, what’s wrong with you? I thought I taught you how to manage your emotions.’ Obviously you haven’t based on results.” 

Though this realization can be difficult for parents to accept, Urbina noted that parents teaching their son or daughter morals, values and principles is an ongoing process until it becomes part of who they are and they decide to live their life by it. 

“It opens up the possibility as parents that we’re not teaching our kids specific life lessons, we’re not teaching them certain ways to live our life that resonates with them so that they own it,” he said. “Once you teach them in a way that they actually learn it, then they flip a switch and now it becomes a part of their functioning. Now it’s part of their wiring.”

Ed. Note: This article is a KHTS Community Spotlight based on the latest “The Alex Urbina Radio Show” on KHTS. 

Santa Clarita Life Coach Alex Urbina is one of the leading experts on teen, parent and family relationships. Specializing in personal transformation, Urbina has more than 20 years of experience as a life coach in Santa Clarita. His Life Leadership Training programs have been implemented in schools, youth organizations and transformational centers across the country. Urbina is also the author of “The Inspirational Parent: The Magical Ingredients for Effective Parenting” and host of “The Alex Urbina Radio Show: Helping You Reach Your Full Potential” on KHTS, which airs Fridays at noon. Those looking for a “life coach near me” can contact Urbina today. 

Alex Urbina

661-505-5021

alex@alexurbina.com

Alex Urbina, Santa Clarita

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S5d6retJ2nw

Alex Urbina, Santa Clarita Life Coach, Life Coach in Santa Clarita, Personal Transformation, Parenting, Parenting Books, The Inspirational Parent, Life Coach Near Me

KHTS FM 98.1 & AM 1220 - Santa Clarita News - Santa Clarita Radio

Life Coach In Santa Clarita: Angry Teens

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